Editor's Note: World domination can be a barrel of laughs. Who knew it could be accomplished in just three month's time? Apparently the more nefarious leaders of the world did not see this wikiHow before it got deleted.

How to Take over the World in Less Than 90 Days

Have you ever had the urge? The urge to splurge? Well, you'll get to splurge all you want with the world at your fingertips. A flick of your wrist and your little brother is toast, literally.


1. Day One. Think about it really hard. And I mean really hard. You can never think about something too hard. Really. Think.

2. Day Two - Day Fifteen. Okay. Time to recruit. Tips for recruiting: Hold a seminar with a vague epithet such as Leadership Conference and How to Raise Truly Great Kids. Brainwash them with yellow sheets.

3. Day Sixteen. The best part of it all, even if the whole thing fails. The firearms. I suggest the following; Ebay,  blackmarket, supahguns.com or my personal favorite, Home Depot.

4. Day Twenty-ish. It's government time. Organize your recruits to buy all the bananas you can and lure the president away from the White House to press "the button".

5. Day Sixties. Get all the opium you can, you are going to need it. I mean, how are you going to suppress all the dissension among your subjects?

6. Day Seventy. Storm Nuclear Powerplants worldwide and steal all enriched uranium. It comes in handy sometimes.

7. Day Eighty-Three. Storm Smith & Wesson. Steal all gunpowder. Or you can go to China. I hear they have a lot.

8. Day Eighty-Five. Rocket-launchers. For protection of your new regime.

9. Day Eighty-Seven. Gunpowder + Uranium = nuclear warheads. Get to it!

10. Day Ninety. Launch campaign. Take all unnecessary measures as possible.


* "The button" - the key to the amazing amount of nuclear warheads.


* Well, you might get thrown over. Watch out for your children!

* Radiation might be a problematic. Keep that in mind.

Article added: 30 May 2008

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